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When travelling I'm
invariably drawn to shops selling the local pastries, where the cakes on offer
are rarely labelled and so I'm usually forced to
resort to the pointing and the 'one of those please'.
So as a service to you if you've ever been confused by the cakes on sale in London
bakers and cake shops,
or if you want to come prepared, I present the largely non-book-related Fictional Cities guide to
the cakes of my home town, and of my youth. And of course no guide to cakes
in London can ignore tasty imports,
especially the
Polish and Portuguese pastries now making inroads into our bellies.
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Apple Turnovers An uncontroversial cake to start with - it's a square (or circle) of sugar-laden flaky pastry folded and filled with apple, or at least some sugary apple-based gloop not unlike baby food. The only real mystery here is, or was, why there aren't turnovers containing any other fruit. I had heard rumours, but not until I clapped my eyes on, and my mouth around, the raspberry turnover (pictured below left) did I truly believe. An apple and blackcurrant turnover has recently been spotted too. And bought. And eaten. |
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Bakewell Pudding Also known as a Bakewell Tart, although the authentic item baked only in three shops in Bakewell (photographed left), who all seem to claim to have the original recipe locked in their fireproof safes, has traditionally always been called a pudding. The inauthentic versions, always called tarts and baked by Mr Kipling among others, has an icing top and a more evident layer of jam. The original relies on it's stout almond paste filling and is made from flaky pastry. Amongst the inauthentic varieties is also to be found the Cherry Bakewell, which has a glacé cherry on top.
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Bath Buns A bun which you usually eat in the bath. No, seriously...the bath bun was invented, so the story goes, by Dr W. Oliver, an 18th Century physician who treated visitors to the famous Bath Spa. His bun proved so popular, and his patients grew so fat, that he had to invent a plain biscuit - hence the Bath Oliver biscuit - for his patients to eat instead. The chunks of sugar sprinkled on the top of this otherwise rather plain bun were originally sugar-coated caraway seeds. |
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Battenberg (aka Battenburg) Bought in a brick and sliced, like fruit cake, the battenberg is a cake for the almond fan, its icing surround being more than a little marzipanish and, as with the frangipan tart, there's apricot jam too. It's famous for the pink and yellow check pattern of its sponge cake, which would be less desirable in, say, a shirt. (The large checker-board patterns on emergency vehicles in the UK are, I've just learned, called battenburg markings.) Said to have been first made to honour the marriage of one of Queen Victoria's granddaughters to Prince Louis of Battenberg in 1884, with each of the four squares representing one of the Battenberg princes. Pimp your battenberg and A brick battenberg |
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Belgian Buns |
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Bread Pudding A slab of dense, moist and spicy sponge, tasting a bit like booze-free Christmas pudding. This one's traditionally eaten hot with custard and is made from stale bread, as is... |
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Bread 'n' Butter Pudding ...but this one also has the appearance and texture of having been made from slices of bread, soaked in milk, with sugar, raisins and spices (cinnamon and/or nutmeg). It is also eaten hot and, being pretty squidgy, is really more of a dessert than a cake. In times past it was a way for poor people to use up leftover stale bread. Now we have more money and buy bread 'n' butter pudding ready-made from supermarkets, with added cream. NB: The B'n'B pudding was photographed on a larger plate. |
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Cheese Cakes |
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Chorley Cakes Another place-named cake, like the Eccles cake below, and like the Eccles cake this is chock-full of raisins. The only difference is in the pastry, which is less flaky and more biscuit-y with this one. A flatter and less airy eating experience results. |
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Cream Horns When I were a lad these were full of sweet imitation cream, but now they seem to be found only in supermarket fridges full of fresh cream and jam. The problem of which end you start with remains - I go for the non-pointy end myself. |
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Custard Tarts A deep tart, full of custard, but cool and wobbly custard, not hot and runny custard, and flavoured with nutmeg. When I was young you could buy them from bakery shop widows, now they are found in supermarket fridges. |
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Danish Pastries OK, we'll take my thing about place-named cakes as read here. I'm hoping that some kind soul in Denmark might be able to help me out. Danish pastries as they're known in the UK are united by having a moist and chewy and quite heavy pastry. Beyond that there are several varieties and shapes. The simplest is the Fruit Danish, which is just a swirl of pastry with raisins. The Custard Danish, The Apricot Danish and the Apple Danish introduce us to different shapes, though. These flavours take the classic shape of the square of pastry with two opposite corners meeting. And sometimes they take the apple-turnover form. Update - August 2008 Some clarity at last. Barbara from Michael's Cycles in Worthing has a Danish mother-in-law who writes thusly: The Danes don’t really have a word covering all of their range of Danish Pastries, tending to call each one by its particular name, and then they have a different type of pastry for times of the day, but generically they talk in terms of Wienerbrød. It really refers to the kringler, the big horseshoe shaped one that you have for breakfast. The name comes from the time when Danish bakers went to Vienna (Wien) in the Napoleonic wars and brought back what they had learned whilst there. Barbara also informs me that the custard ones are known in Denmark as 'Pus in the Baker's Eye'. Lovely. But then clarity descends into controversy! Richard in California finds a source that claims that some Austrian bakers who were hired to replace Danish bakers during a strike passed on their method (of rolling butter between the layers of puff pastry then letting it rest before shaping and baking) which the Danish bakers then spread around the World. So it's either a pastry technique that Danish bakers brought back from Austria or one that the Austrian bakers themselves took to Denmark. |
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Eccles Cakes |
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Frangipan
tarts |
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Fruit Cake 'Fruit' here means currents and raisins (and often cherries) similarly to the 'Fruit Danish' which signifies circularness and the presence of raisins. Fruit cake is mostly sold in brick-like slabs, or made domestically in the traditional round cake shape, but it is also available in individual slices. Sometimes known as cherry genoa. It also comes in a paler circular form with a sugary top, where its name then acquires one or more of the words country, house, traditional and manor. And, again - you'll have seen this coming by now - does the name "cherry genoa" have anything to do with Genoa the place? |
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Hot Cross Buns
UK supermarkets have been indulging
in lily-gilding too in recent years with many new versions of this old
favourite. You can get Extra Spicy, Luxury (which usually just means more
raisins), Apple & Cinnamon, Date and Cranberry, Cinnamon &
Raisin and (brace yourself) Belgian Chocolate versions. |
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Marlborough buns A new one on me. A bit like a rock cake but with some glazing going on, sugar bits, currents, and a citrus thing, I think. Nice, and not needing buttering. My not having heard of them before may be because they seem to be an invention of Marks & Spencer and/or Waitrose, which seem to be the only sources. |
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Muffins |
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Drozdzowka Polish apple and
cinnamon thing I did the traditional 'what's that?' point and ask thing. And what it is is large and made of a bun-type pastry. It has a big dent full of chunky real-apple filling, and it's not light on the cinnamon. |
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Poppy seed cake Can be (and is more usually) bought as a big slab that you slice up, but also comes as individual cakes. Redolent of the Danish in shape, but more bunlike and light in consistency, and chock full of poppy seeds, as you'd expect. The taste is unexpected, though, being more full of flavour than the ingredients might suggest. Maybe something else is going on here. Also said by the woman in my local Polish deli to be more of a Christmas thing. |
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Cocodoughnut A darkish and squarish doughnut with coconut-flecked icing and a custardy filling. The sweetness of the icing tends to overwhelm the coconut bits a bit, and the added zing of the filling makes for a decidedly unsubtle cake, but not an unpleasant one |
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Portuguese Custard Tarts Pretty similar to the native version, except smaller and with a pastry base that's best described as stout and chewy flaky pastry. They're also quite a bit sweeter with that caramelised topping replacing the nutmeg. So not really that similar at all. Known in Portugal as pastéis de nata they were first created by Catholic nuns at the Jerónimos Monastery in an area of Lisbon called Belém. The Casa Pastéis de Belém bought the 'secret' recipe and began making them when the convent closed in 1820, and then they were renamed pastéis de Belém. This authentic version is sprinkled with cinnamon and powdered sugar, it is said. |
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Simnel Cake
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Tottenham Sponge |
All cakes photographed by me and guaranteed eaten within
mere minutes of the photograph being
taken.
No waste here.

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